Oh my goodness! There is so much going on around here right now, I must confess that I'm having a hard time keeping track of it all. I bought a brand new dry erase calendar for the refrigerator, and Steve and I have ourselves a regular 'check in about the day' in bed every morning. Somewhere in the hours of 5 to 6 am, with (at least) two children between us, we try to troubleshoot, plan and make sense of it all. And still, there are balls being dropped and things forgotten about. This morning I went outside in the fog before first tea, in my pajamas, silly wool hat, and big tall barn boots for morning chores. With a camera around my neck, minding my own business, I came across not just one strange man, but five in my backyard. One on an excavator, two with the cement truck, one delivering trusses, and one whom I can't quite tell what he was doing. I rather forgot - until I turned the corner to my clothesline that is no longer (until construction is complete) - that I might encounter folks working. I went back inside to make breakfast for the small crew of friends here for a few nights helping us build an entirely separate structure. The structure for the animals and the ones they might (hopefully) birth in the spring. The structure that really needs to be complete in the next three weeks, but is already woefully behind. And then there is an editor's letter for the next Taproot issue that is (over)due along with a whole lot of editorial work before we go to print (soon, soon!). And just when I start to feel overwhelmed by all of that, Tchaikovsky starts playing in my head, and I remember that between regular classes and rehearsals, I need to get ourselves to the dance studio six nights a week this month. Is this week really Halloween? Has anyone vacuumed the floor lately? And, more importantly, has anyone fed the cat today?
Oh me oh my oh....as I say very often. (quoting a very favorite song - and as a side note, if you ever have the chance to hear that duo live, you simply must).
But all is well. That's the honest truth. In my moments of alone time (mere moments these days, but I'm finding them), I have been enjoying the work of the lovely Brene Brown. And one particular phrase of hers that has been at the forefront of my mind this week, has been 'soften into joy". Soften Into Joy - isn't that wonderful? (Her introduction to the phrase may be in a slightly different explanation than how I'm using it, but I think she'd approve.)
For all of the chaos and wildness and busyness that is going on around me is good. It is full, yes....but it needn't be resisted, for it is beautifully full of family, and passion and life. There are children with hammers creating space for baby lambs. There are loud excavators making a room for Gram. There is work that I truly love doing. There is...each other. And well, in the moments where it's tempting to feel overwhelmed by it all, I am mindfully stopping myself. And remembering that I can instead just soften into the joy, for that's really what all of this is. It changes everything, that shift in thinking. From overwhelm to fullness, from chaos to abundance.
Undoubtedly, we all begin our weeks with a lot on our calendar and our hopeful to do list. This week especially, I wish you all a week full of joy. Enjoy it, friends.
